I’d guess that most people would say their Elder’s Quorum and Relief Society discussions are about general conference talks. However, that’s not what the handbook says the discussion should focus on. Section 9.2.1.2 says “The focus [of gospel instruction and discussion] should be on topics in one or more talks from the most recent general conference” (emphasis added). The handbook uses the exact same wording for the Elder’s Quorum in section 8.2.1.2. Having the discussion be about a topic or theme from a talk is different than having the discussion be about the talk. This is a subtle but powerful distinction.

I’ve mentioned this distinction to a number of current Relief Society teachers and presidents. The typical response is wide-eyed excitement as they start to understand how they might approach lessons in new ways. They’ve all appreciated having awareness of this difference. It gives them church-approved language to start conversations about how their wards could have more engaging Relief Society discussions. I’ve heard more than one person say that part of the reason some sisters don’t come to Relief Society is because the lessons are a forty minute summary of a ten minute talk.

Many members are tired of talks about talks and lessons about talks. Some leaders are aware of this fatigue and have taken proactive steps to encourage members to share more of their own spiritual learning. Here is the boilerplate talk assignment text used in one blogger’s ward:
“Please consider the general conference talk [talk name and speaker] from this past General Conference. However, when preparing your remarks, please focus on 1) the theme, and 2) your testimony of the Savior, the gospel, and how the theme helps you draw closer to the Savior. The purpose of the conference talk is to help you connect with the Spirit regarding the theme. While you are invited to quote sections of the talk, your comments should remain focused on the theme, over the talk. Of course, you may use scripture, other talks, Church resources, etc. as the Spirit directs. Thanks again.”
The language used shows that the leaders want members to share personal experiences with their own gospel learning. Even with this invitation though, most people still summarize the conference talk.

It is easier to summarize a talk than to create your own lesson plan or talk. The latter requires more time and skill. It’s a skill that needs to be taught and modeled. One blogger lived in a ward where the Bishopric would write a talk based on just the title of the conference talk. They would then compare the points that both talks covered.

Creating lesson plans is also a skill that takes time and practice to develop. Here are some steps that I’ve found helpful in creating meaningful experiences in Relief Society:

Steps to plan a lesson

1. Identify the theme in the talk that you want to discuss with the class
2. Consider your personal experiences with the theme
3. Outline how to spend the lesson time. Most lessons can be broken into 2-4 segments. Guess how much time is needed for each segment and consider any logistics needed to create the experience you want. A few tricks I’ve learned:
   • A quote or a story from a talk may introduce a segment
   • Alternatively, it may work better to discuss the topic first and then bring in a quote, story, or scripture. This allows you to gauge what your class already understands about the topic and how they might relate (or not!) to the quote you selected.
   • Sharing your own experiences can encourage others to share theirs. This can help the conversation get started. As the teacher, you can carefully select experiences to share ahead of time.
   • A powerful teaching tool is to have the last segment of the lesson be time where the class members can practice the topic together.

Example lesson

Here’s how I used those steps to create a lesson:

1. I was assigned Elder Holland’s talk “Motions of a Hidden Fire”. The theme I chose to cover was “prayer”.
2. I thought of a number of prayer experiences that were particularly meaningful to me. I noticed that none of them were the typical prayer-on-your-knees-before-bed that we usually talk about. This resonated with the part of Elder Holland’s talk where he tells about Jesus praying in so many ways in so many different contexts.
3. I chose to plan my lesson around this three segment outline:
   1. prayer is for learning (introduce the topic)
   2. prayer can take a variety of forms (allow time for sharing)
   3. pray for those around you (practice living the principle)

Here’s the expanded version of the three lesson segments:

1. I used a story to get to a quote. I started by telling a story about how all my daughters were obsessed with Frozen when they were little. They played it all the time! Two of them played very creatively and what “playing Frozen” looked like varied from day to day. The other was much more literal and you had to quote the lines just like the movie when you played with her. Then I had the class guess what I thought that story had to do with prayer. (The way we pray may be different from each other, but we’re still doing the same thing: communicating with God. Prayer is for learning just like play is for learning.) We read a quote from the talk where it says Jesus prayed in so many ways.
2. I asked the class to share some of the memorable/meaningful prayers they’ve experienced. My class jumped right in and started sharing, but I had an experience picked out ahead of time in case people needed more time to think. Some ways that I remember being discussed: writing your prayer out to help your mind stay focused, praying while going for a walk, composing a prayer ahead of time.
3. Elder Holland’s talk quoted Amulek, who said that we should pray for “those who are around you.” I wanted the class to experience doing this together. Creating this experience required some planning. A few days before class, I sent a message through Circles suggesting that something sisters could do to prepare for our lesson would be to think of someone around you to pray for. I arrived early to arrange the chairs in a kind of circle. There was a back row. There were multiple breaks in the circle for easy escape. I made sure to watch the clock because I wanted to have plenty of time for this segment of class. When we got to this point of the lesson, I explained that we would be saying a prayer together and anyone who wanted to participate should sit in the inner circle. We’d pass around a stone and when the stone got to you, you were welcome to pray for a person close to your heart. There was no obligation to participate; you could simply pass the stone along or stay in the back row if you wanted to. Once the rock went around the circle, I would close the prayer.

This lesson ended up being a beautiful experience. The whole lesson only referenced Elder Holland’s talk twice. The discussion was about prayer, not his talk (although his talk certainly shaped how I structured the lesson). The power of the lesson was in how it invited sisters to commune not just with God, but also with each other. This is what I crave at church: connection with those around me.

After I’d written out the steps to my lesson plan method, I got curious about what lesson guidance is in Teaching, No Greater Call. I appreciate the list of methods found at the end of the “Teaching with Variety” chapter. There is a chapter on “Creating Lessons from Conference Talks and Other Resources” that would be great to discuss in a teacher training meeting. In their example, they only used an excerpt from a talk. If leaders assigned a short excerpt from a talk (perhaps along with a theme), it could help speakers and teachers focus on the desired topic.

I’d love to hear ideas from our readers! Has your ward been successful in teacher development? How did you do it? What topics do you wish were covered in your Relief Society discussions? If you are a leader, what topics will you be looking for in General Conference?

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