This is a Guest Post by Anonymous. Anonymous is a BYU graduate, former stake leader, and mother of a large family with pioneer ancestry on both sides.
[Content warning: abuse, domestic violence]
Domestic Violence Awareness Month
October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month. It is also the birth month of Sister Breanne Pennington, whose LDS husband killed her a few days before her 31st birthday. Last year, Exponent published “Remember Breanne,” in December, and within two weeks, Breanne’s case began appearing in the news again. I want to credit the Exponent sisterhood for their contribution to the following developments:
- January 5th, police reinstated their previously suspended manhunt for Sister Breanne’s killer: https://www.cbsnews.com/boston/news/aaron-pennington-gardner-massachusetts-state-police-search-ashburnham/
- February 21st, Sister Breanne’s aunt hosted a vigil for her in the town where she lived; local domestic violence groups were there to show support and advocate: https://www.cbsnews.com/boston/news/gardner-vigil-breanne-pennington/
- September 2024, police again resumed the search for Pennington in the woods where his car was found, an area where local LDS youth also camp with the ward and stake brethren: https://www.thegardnernews.com/story/news/local/2024/09/23/aaron-pennington-search-camp-collier-gardner-mass-state-police-drones/75350070007/ [NOTE: paywall]
- The GoFundMe for Breanne’s four children remains active as of October 2024: https://www.gofundme.com/f/the-pennington-children
Keep Her Memory Alive
As a member of Sister Breanne’s stake, I want to keep her memory alive for the sake of other sisters whose well-being is at risk due to hidden abuse. I offer the following action items we can perform in memory of Breanne and all other sisters like her:
- Learn how to talk about domestic violence. Listen to podcasts, follow DV nonprofits on social; learn from them and share what you learn. We can all be influencers for women’s safety.
- Break the silence. When a church lesson discusses a passage of scripture with violence against women, consider raising your hand to talk about it. Hidden victims in those classes need to know that somebody cares about them. Women’s safety is an issue where the sisterhood presides.
- Show up for women’s safety. Local domestic violence organizations host bake sales, fun runs, walkathons, pet parties, safety merch, and more. By getting involved and showing we care about this issue, we send a message to our daughters, sisters, and women everywhere that they are not alone.
Get Help
If anybody reading this article has ever felt unsafe, neglected, or coercively controlled at home, please consider calling a hotline or reaching out to a local DV shelter, where they offer private, confidential, web-based counseling.
Sisters, your well-being matters. You matter. Countless advocates have built entire, even global, organizations to help YOU stay safe. Please reach out.
4 Responses
Thank you so much for sharing all of this and keeping her memory alive! I hope she is somewhere watching and can see what you’re doing for her. I hope this helps save another woman from the same fate. ❤️
Thank you so much for this post. Thank you for your efforts and support.
Thank you so much for this post! I would add that we need to also speak out when we see unrighteous dominion in our wards and stake. I have seen several instances where “priesthood leaders” reinforced unhealthy patterns at home. Our top-down, hierarchial, no questioning allowed structure is not healthy. I realize there are men in leadership positions that are open to feedback, but my experience has been that is the exception not the norm. For one example, see my post earlier this year of my husband being asked first if I could serve in the calling and my efforts to provide feedback to both Bishop and Stake President. What message does this send to the members of our wards? What unhealthy abuses and patterns at home get reinforced when this happens at church?
Here is the link https://exponentii.org/blog/guest-post-who-has-the-power-in-2024/