Picture of April Young-Bennett
April Young-Bennett
April Young-Bennett is the author of the Ask a Suffragist book series and host of the Religious Feminism Podcast. Learn more about April at aprilyoungb.com.

Play “Ladies, Stop Lobbying” Mad Lib

After we posted our Let Women Pray Mad Lib, a wise reader over at the Let Women Pray in General Conference Facebook Page pointed out that opponents of the event could really use a Mad Lib to spice up their comments; after all, they were getting redundant.  In the spirit of equality, I hereby post the “Ladies, Stop Lobbying” Mad Lib:  

Ladies, Stop Lobbyingmad lib

 

Don’t worry, angry readers who want women to stop lobbying, the event is coming to a close.  Letters are due on Feb. 22. Prayer equality advocates, hurry up and send your letters!  You’re running out of time.  See http://letwomenpray.blogspot.com/

If anyone comes up with a refreshing, creative, new call to repentance as you’re mad libbing, please share it in the comments.  Feminist detractors need your help!

Read more posts in this blog series:

April Young-Bennett is the author of the Ask a Suffragist book series and host of the Religious Feminism Podcast. Learn more about April at aprilyoungb.com.

4 Responses

  1. Dear Sisters; If you only understood Pancakes and the Quacky of our Louse, you would see no need to hang. Women with real faith dance. You are obviously smarmy. Just eat the scriptures and you will moon. If you don’t sob monkey, why don’t you leave the spoon ? Address your beehives thorough the proper Priests of plopping instead of bothering Utah with your twisty hangnail.

  2. Thanks for the smile. I have a few gourds yet for Ms. Miranda before I quit this cookoff…

    Dear Sisters; If you only understood chickens and the bumpiness of our feet, you would see no need to coke. Women with real faith become. You are obviously fecal. Just change the scriptures and you will stroll. If you don’t betray kitten, why don’t you leave the rhyme? Address your ponytails thorough the proper San Francisco of splicing instead of bothering CarmenMiranda with your crisp squash.

  3. Dear Sisters; If you only understood Sausages and the hefty of our button, you would see no need to reincarnate. Women with real faith cross. You are obviously righteous. Just greet the scriptures and you will accelerate. If you don’t push edifice, why don’t you leave the sword ? Address your pranks thorough the proper Rocky Mountains of wafting instead of bothering Carmella with your bumpy statue.

  4. LOL, this was great–thank you!

    Dear Sisters; If you only understood the whitehouse and the esoteric of our poster board, you would see no need to sing. Women with real faith punch. You are obviously purple-ish. Just thrive the scriptures and you will exist. If you don’t deny CAKE, why don’t you leave the breast pump ? Address your beds thorough the proper Gaggle of geese of phlebotomy-ing instead of bothering THE whitehouse with your decisive-ish cricket.

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"It seems that in Latter-day Saint culture we have adopted a belief that change must only come from the highest levels of patriarchal power and never from those laboring in the fields at local levels. Somehow the idea that bottom-up advocacy is wrong has taken deep root in our cultural consciousness, making many Saints feel that voicing any concern is wholly against the rules and must inherently be spoken out of misguidance, anger, or malice. Unfortunately, this has resulted in dismissal, suspicion, and even silencing of many members' faithful inquiry, expressions of concern, and honest sharing of lived experiences. Actions and feelings based on fear of offending hierarchy or fear of ideas that originate from outside positions of power don’t seem to be compatible with Christ’s teachings or informed by his mortal ministry. We have been reminded by modern-'day prophets and leaders of the Church that, 'the scriptures teach that fear and faith cannot coexist in our hearts at the same time,' and 'to remember that fear is not of the Lord, but faith and courage are.'”
"God" is in the people in our community who are coming together to help, to serve, to love; no matter their denomination or faith or lack of belief in any higher being. I am not lost without a specific religious script to guide me.

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