“Through an Empty Chapel”
“I can’t believe I have to leave.”It was the first time I had felt peace at church in a long time. Even though it was just a thought, trapped inside my head, where no one could see, it shook me. I felt the tears begin to well up. The hymns I was singing felt holy. The pew I sat in felt holy. The words I had heard offered over the pulpit that day felt holy. It had been the first time in a long time that any of it felt right. More than right—it was beautiful. Anticipatory grief is grief that […]
“Without the Walls”
It is not a breaking through, a reaching down, a pulling up. We are not running, cunningly, past drunken guards to enter in. It cannot be kept from within. Our loose, liquid, bodies are not seeping into heaven’s cloth. It is seeping into us. Here we stand, as witnesses, until our fiber knees absorb the weight. (Photo by Pawel Czerwinski on Unsplash)
“Never Ceasing”
I. She is mighty to save. Her arms are at least half hanging skin from carrying, birthing, mourning souls. Souls are heavy. Bodies are heavy, even of tiny children. Her love has gravity. It will root us when we root for our Mother’s milk. II. You are not always what I want. You are not what I think I need either. I am speaking to myself, but also to you. III. Help me accept you in the ways you show up for me. Help me accept you in texts, blue bubbles, and people trying their best. Last night, I told […]
