In celebration of 50 Years of Exponent II. A version of this paper was given at the 2024 Sunstone Symposium.

In the early days of Exponent 2, I was able to be in Boston when my dad was presenting at a conference there. I remember gatherings in the homes of some of the founding mothers. There were discussions about Mormon Women’s unique history and role in the church and the world. They were bringing new life and awareness of that history in the form of The Exponent 2, a continuation of the unique Mormon women’s publication from the 19th century. It seemed as though there had just been a temporary interruption in the production in the intervening decades. 

I loved hearing and reading about the stories of my foremothers, and I found this fascinating. I was a teenager, so thought I could just sit to the side and listen in while the adults, almost all of them women, shared ideas and plans. But this was different from the fireside discussions my parents hosted in their home, or the classes Dad taught that I would sit in on. Here, women’s voices were prevalent and prominent. They were unapologetically in charge. They occasionally referred to conversations with men, but this was women’s space, where women were seen and heard. I remember one of them coming to me, introducing herself (I wish I could remember her name) and asking about my life and interests. Me, an awkward teenager. My youth and awkwardness did not matter. I was a sister, and my existence, my presence was valued. Then, and I will never forget this, she asked what my mother did. Because my mother was also a sister, and valued. This was not the norm in the 70s, not for me, and definitely not when I was around people who knew anything about my dad. From that time, I felt a part of Exponent 2. I looked forward to the issues arriving in the mail, and began to look for the names of my favorite poets and writers, and especially essays. I wondered if I would ever write anything others would want to read or discuss. It was interesting to recall this when I was speaking with Laurel Thatcher Ulrich at the 2024 Exponent 2 Retreat. I told her that her writings back then encouraged me to write. Her voice encouraged me to have a voice. She told me that my dad had had that influence on her, encouraging her to write, publish, and have a voice. It was an interesting circle of influence.

It would take too much time to list all of the books, stories and articles I read because of Exponent 2. Through them I also learned of the conferences, pilgrimages and retreats, speakers at Sunstone from the early years to the present day. Other women in the growing influence of Exponent 2 continued to see me, value my voice, and invite me into space to share my voice. Along with countless other women. 

This was desperately needed in the years before 1993, the September Six, and the ongoing purges after. These were the years when feminists were openly declared dangerous, when home gatherings were suppressed, history was denied, and Mormon feminists experienced their own kind of Salem Witch Trials. There was no internet community, but we needed each other. Exponent 2 was one of the life saving threads of connection.

Mormon women needed community where we could heal deep wounds, and mourn, comfort and support each other.

One way Exponent 2 influenced healing circles at this time was the creation of online and other gathering communities. These were created from need and the unique ministering experience of women in the church. The most powerful and healing components of ward communities are those of compassionate ministry not connected to authority or calling – therefore, that of women. Our entire church service has taught us to create healing for what is needed, without a script, or budget, or permission. It is a practice in constantly doing the works of learning and listening, seeking inspiration, and being ready to make something happen which has never been done before. This is what is needed when we gather to deal with the deep wounds of this world, and there is no manual, no way to fix it. We gather, and hold each other up, and heal, even if the only healing is through sitting with each other, valuing our existence. 

There is something interesting about these healing spaces. In today’s world, and throughout history, women had to wait for permission to exist, to show up, to speak, to have thoughts, to have a soul, to vote. 

Exponent 2 exists because there were and are women, in the 19^th, 20^th and 21^st century, who did not wait, seek or need permission. They learned about their history, they saw a need, they created space for women’s voices and existence.

Women of Exponent 2 were a part of Dialogue, Sunstone, Mormon Women’s Forum, many pilgrimages and retreats, Feminist Mormon Housewives, podcasts and blogs, many resource and therapy groups for Mormon Feminists. This is just a partial list. 

As many of you have found, there is something incredible that happens when women gather in spaces created by women. 

I will never forget the women’s Spiritual Resistance Retreat in 2017. Natasha Helfer and Gina Colvin-Ruwhiu arranged it for inauguration weekend to follow the Women’s March in Washington D.C. It was an incredible experience. And, after last session, women there felt they could ask for things they had never thought to ask. We had hours of healing, lifesaving blessing circles, including a vicarious blessing recorded for someone on the other side of the country. 

In spaces created by women, for women, we can look for what is needed and wanted. There is the possibility of creating newly, and not being constrained by a script or past pattern that does not fit the current need.

A few years ago, I saw a presentation about a conference that was named for my father. The men who organized the conference presented a book compilation of the speeches which had the theme of modern sacred text. They were proud that two of the 20 speeches from the conference were by women scholars, and they were looking forward to the conference next year which had the theme of – you guessed it – “Women”. Organized by men. During this presentation about the book, they only took questions from men, even though I was standing up, waving my hand. I had plenty of questions about modern sacred text, and how it impacts women. But I had much more to say about how their actions in not having more women’s voices at the conference, and not turning over the entire conference about women to women – this was taking the name of my dad in vain, since this conference series was named for him. One male friend followed me out of the presentation when I had to leave early, and listened to my concerns. He asked the question I often hear from men. “We want to include more women, but not many apply. How do we get more women to present?” I told him that it takes real effort for men to create space where women are heard, and men rarely do that. It requires much more than an invitation.

When women are invited into men’s spaces, they are not seen or heard in the way they are in women’s spaces. In one, their presence and voice is allowed, often restricted, and framed as coming from outside being invited in. In women’s spaces, it is inherently worthy and powerful, valued for its very existence, considering the time to listen well spent, and expressing appreciation for everyone’s contribution. This is the default mode, 

I remember calling my dad out one time about really listening to women’s voices. I wasn’t the only one. And I saw him really work at it. He went into women’s spaces, and sat off to the side, just to listen and learn. There were times when he would step aside in his role as editor so women could have space to create. I have heard progressive and ex-Mormon men ask, how do we get more women to come and participate, or be a part of what we are doing. I tell them there is something very unique that happens in women’s spaces that is a huge missing where men run things. I suggest they go into them to just be present to it, maybe learn, but never even hope they can imitate it. I’ll let you know if I see any consistent results. I haven’t yet. 

I did a rewrite of a verse from Doctrine and Covenants 121:39 that describes my experience with men in many communities, including progressive, and ex-mormon, and political and academic circles. (I consider this section one of the most important pieces of sacred text, offering excellent insight into how God’s power of love can work, and how anything that is not like it will fail).

“We have learned by sad experience that it is the nature and disposition of almost all men, as soon as they allow a tiny space for women, and let them speak a few words, they assume they know and understand, as they suppose, all aspects of all women’s experience, and they will immediately congratulate each other for doing so, call a press conference or record a podcast announcing their innovative work, then begin again to exercise dominion of women’s voice, appearance, thoughts, history, wants, opinion, and opportunity.”

Meanwhile, women’s spaces created by women continue to increase. 

Mormon Women’s History Initiative has produced amazing insight and writing. 

Mormon Women for Ethical Government is an organization that is having an impact on candidates and political actions at all levels.

Women’s History Project at the Church History department – I deeply mourn the loss of Kate Holbrook and Melissa Inouye in this space.

Segullah continues as a beautiful magazine for women’s art and literature.

At Last She Said It, Latter Day Struggles, Young Mormon Feminists, Breaking Down Patriarchy, Year of Polygamy,  – these and other podcasts by women have become essential listening for Mormon Women. They are a lifeline for many discovering their own journey.

A few years ago, leading up to a surgery I felt ill prepared to face, sisters of all kinds gathered. My own sisters from birth, my faith journey sisters, gathered physically and virtually. Some had arranged for others to write a blessing for me (thank you for that, Carol Lynn), others organized a zoom call, and they each created their own language of blessing, of creating healing for me. 

This is what Exponent 2 has done. Created a sealing love that is more powerful than time and distance, turning the hearts of mothers to daughters, daughters to mothers, making sisters of us all, sealed by the only power that lasts. Love.