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Each week my ward typically sings one of the less-commonly-sung hymns from the current green hymnal. It’s a way to say goodbye to the old songs as we welcome the new ones. A few weeks ago we sang I’m a Pilgrim, I’m a Stranger, which I don’t ever remember hearing. The end of verse two pricked my heart. First, there’s the phrase “I’m apt to go astray”. It reminded me of the “Bind my wandering heart to Thee” line in Come Thou Fount of Every Blessing that has been so beloved. The rest of verse two is quite graphic. The full line is “I’m apt to go astray with the many, with the many That are now the vulture’s prey.”

The word ‘vulture’ caught my attention. I recently listened to a podcast series hosted by Radiolab called Border Trilogy. The first episode started with a chilling story about a human arm being discovered in the desert. The second episode tells about how pig carcasses left in the desert were picked clean by vultures in just a few days. I’ll discuss these podcasts more, but first I want to talk more about the hymn.

I’m a Pilgrim, I’m a Stranger was written by Hans Henry Petersen, who converted to the church in Denmark and immigrated to Utah in 1862 (the same year as my Danish pioneer ancestors!). He crossed the plains in a wagon train. The song is about journeying through a treacherous landscape and pleading for God’s guidance. The consequences of this journey are a matter of life and death. I’d imagine the song would have resonated with the thousands of other saints who made the perilous journey across the plains. There’s a spiritual metaphor in the message as well, and I found the way this hymn expresses uncertainty to be refreshing. It essentially says ‘I don’t really know what I’m doing, and life is scary, but I’m trying to follow God even when I don’t know how.’

I certainly see myself in the spiritual metaphor of the song, but not so much in the physical hardship part. I have been privileged not to have to worry much about my physical safety during long journeys. My family has driven across the great plains a couple of times and, while we did experience dangers like hail storms and rattlesnakes, mostly we experienced a few days of happy family vacation. We own a well maintained van. We can afford to travel for pleasure, and have insurance and savings in the bank in case something does go wrong. For my family, the dangers of cross country travel aren’t significantly more than everyday life.

I have ancestors who were among the early Mormon pioneers. I can certainly think of their experiences when I sing this song, but I also want to think about people who are currently moving because they are unable to provide for their families or their homes are not safe. There are millions of refugees and displaced people in the world, and these numbers have been rising significantly in the last decade. In the 1800’s the Saints hadn’t been safe in Nauvoo. They needed (another) fresh start.

Despite my Mormon heritage and growing up in Las Vegas, it wasn’t until I was an adult that I understood that Nevada and Utah (and California, and a large part of Arizona, and more) were Mexican territory until 1848. The Saints arrived in the Salt Lake valley the year before, in 1847, when it was still technically Mexican territory. I don’t know if it was legal for U. S. citizens to settle there (I tried a few Google searches; I’m happy to hear from historians). At any rate Mexico was busy with the Mexican American War, and there was little oversight in that remote area.

Immigration at the U. S. southern border is an ever present topic in the news. I hear all the time that thousands cross the border illegally, but I don’t have a very good sense of why Central and South American countries are so impoverished and unsafe. I’m appallingly ignorant of the countries’ histories, no less current events. I recognize that I need to do more to educate myself.A website that is helping me understand this context is called Armed Conflict Location & Event Data, but I’d welcome other resources in the comments.

The Border Trilogy podcast I mentioned earlier is a long-form piece that has helped me understand the evolution of U. S. border policies. In short, since the early 1990’s the United States southern border has had a ‘prevention through deterrence’ strategy to reduce illegal immigration. Disrupting traditional urban crossing places pushes people to cross the border in extreme environments. The thinking was that this would slow the migrants’ movements, make them easier to catch, and hopefully the danger would deter people from coming. Border patrol’s official count of people who die in the desert each year has skyrocketed from single digit numbers before this policy to over two hundred after. The actual number of people who die in the desert each year is likely in the thousands. Vultures, ravens, domestic dogs, beetles, and ants can consume a body in just a few days. The U. S. government knowingly puts people in harms way, and the desert cleans up the dead.

All of that was going through my head when I was sitting in church, singing about vultures. I don’t think that people who die in the desert have necessarily “gone astray” in the spiritual sense. I don’t want anyone to feel compelled to make such a dangerous journey. I’m not an immigration expert. I don’t know how to enact a more humane system. I don’t know what foreign policies the U. S. could create to encourage other countries to thrive. I do know that Jesus commanded me to love my enemies. I do know that Jesus spoke of his way being one of abundance for all. I do know that Jesus taught me to feed the hungry and take in the stranger because “Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me.” I ache for people who are worried about being deported. What can I do? I don’t know until I try.

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